god I wish I could record you sometimes, you're so neurotic
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
He felt like a one man threesome
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
His nipple licking is glorious
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