real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
Randomize
