he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Randomize
