I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
Randomize