I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Randomize
