Whoa Z and x make the same sound
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
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