with your own penis?
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
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