Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Randomize
