Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
