We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Randomize
