i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Randomize
