Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
