You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
Randomize
