theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Randomize