And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Randomize
