hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
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