He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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