On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
