She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
Randomize
