a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize