Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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