I want to have your abortion
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Randomize
