i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
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