in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
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