Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
