There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
Randomize
