I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
Randomize
