Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize
