butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
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