She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
