a queef is a wish your heart makes.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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