You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
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