just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
vagina is talking i cant
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
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