We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
Randomize
