That's intense
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
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