Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
Randomize
