You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
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