She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
third nipple confirmed
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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