So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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