Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
