i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Randomize
