Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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