grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
Randomize
