Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
Randomize
