hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Randomize