Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
Someone came in the potted fern
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
