just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
