Why do I fail so hard at ironing, when I'm a woman and i should be amazing at it?
because god found you far too good at oral sex and had to make all things even?
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize