Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
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