Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Randomize
