You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
Randomize
